It's Here - My Book I Didn't Sign Up For This
I am so excited to finally be sharing my debut book with you, I Didn’t Sign Up for This: A couples therapist shares real-life stories of breaking patterns and finding joy in relationships… including her own.
What started out as envy while watching others release their work of art into the world, fuelled the thought from in my bathtub one March night: I can do this too.
The envy came from a deep desire of having always wanted to write a book. But the desire came well before soaking in the calm of my favourite bath salts while the roars of the kids outside the door echoed through the hall.
In 2013, a lifelong friend (the one who was in my kindergarten classes and at all my summer pool birthday parties in grade school) had asked me if I had “written that couples book yet.” It was another seed, planted. Because writing has been a lifelong part of me - from short stories in grade school, to long journal entries to deal with intense teenage emotions, and to even longer pieces detailing my heartbreak in my early twenties. Writing was my tool.
With over two years of work…. there were a lot of powerful moments of seeing the stories flow freely on the page, to the well of tears free flowing as I questioned whether I could actually do this.
I didn’t think I could do this.
And… I kept going. And now, today, with my eyes welling up, I get to say this to you.
(To those of you who have DM’d me the last few months saying “just give me the book already!” We made it!!!)
I created this book for you. For the chance for you to see yourself in one piece of someone else’s narrative. To have a moment of saying, “it’s not just me” or “I feel deeply seen.” I wrote this book in story, following five relationships, so that you can go along with me with couples who make real changes in their own relationship.
Using story, I share with you how three couples and one mother show up to my office step out of codependency and into building healthy interdependence. These stories are about all of us, as we try to navigate just how hard it is to build a connected relationship, when the truth is that no one taught us how to do this.
I hope you, as the reader, will feel seen through this book. My goal in these stories is so that you might feel validated for the struggles that show up in your own relationships, for those moments where you have also said loudly or silently “I didn’t sign up for this.”
As we transition from pre-order to live sales you can find the book anywhere you buy books from! Or visit my website to learn more.
I’m so grateful for you - for those who have shared my posts and reels, talked to friends about the tips I’m sharing, and sent me DMs to let me know how something resonated. This community is doing something so meaningful - you are changing your relationships, and you are changing yourself. And if you have children, you are changing what it means for our kids to love and be loved.
Let’s take our “I didn’t sign up for this” moments and remind ourselves that we are not stuck in a cave, but instead going through a tunnel, toward the light, to finding a relationship that feels safe and secure for each of us.
Warmly,
Dr. Tracy
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